A Little Pep Talk

So… I blogged about getting down in the dumps (here) when my blog turned 1: those feelings were a direct result of analysing my self-worth against my stats on social media.

Namely followers on Instagram.

In that blog post, rather than focussing on the negatives, I decided to look at all the positive things which have resulted from a year of being on social media and blogging.

However, it seems some of my lovely insta-friends have recently been experiencing a similar Insta-fatigue and overall, a general flatness towards Instagram, just as I did back in March.

And I can’t stand it.

I can’t bear to think that anyone is getting down on their selves…

I’m allowed to get down on me – but not you!

Hypocrite?

Moi?!

I know… going off piste here today; but, before I give you a ‘recent purchases’ update, I need to have a little pep talk with you all first.

This is probably one of the most over-used quotes on Instagram.

These wise words come from none other than Teddy Roosevelt, a man who also said “criminals should be sterilized and feeble-minded persons forbidden to leave offspring behind them” not to mention his reference about Africans as, “ape-like naked savages, who…prey on creatures not much wilder or lower than themselves.”

So whilst old Teddy was a horrible racist, (probably a sexist & bigot too: history repeating itself in the US?!) no one can doubt the wisdom of this ‘Comparison’ quote.

On Joining Instagram in March 2016, I think I remained true to my un-competitive, not-particularly-jealous self until probably January this year.

And then something horrible happened.

It crept up on me and pounced.

Pretty much came out of no where.

I started to compare myself.

As my one year blogging-insta-birthday approached, it occurred to me that some of my insta-friends had been doing the same as me – for the same amount of time.

And their numbers (followers) were crazy big compared to my own.

Feelings of doubt and failure crept in.

I started to question whether or not I should carry on blogging?  After all – who wants to read anything written by me? A no-body, mid-40s, short-arse who has far too much to say for herself but doesn’t say it that well, isn’t exactly witty with her writing and… and… and… yes, on and on went the downward spiral.

Try as I might to remain focussed and positive, it was no good.

The Insta-doom had hit me.

Hard.

However, at the time, I probably posted less and less on Instagram and by default, ended up channelling my energy into the very reason behind joining Instagram: me & my blog.

I created a weekly Sunday 7 feature about things which had caught my eye during the week which seemed to go down well with my readers.

I remembered why I started my blog: for me, but also as someone who was fed up of being invisible in the world of fashion (i.e. in my 40s AND petite) I thought I could share my petites fashion finds which might prove useful to others.

I focussed more on my petites niche, instead of trying to be all things to all people.

I also started being braver with actually putting my own styling ideas for outfits into posts… no great reinventions of the wheel or anything, just putting a little more of myself into my blog.

I also relaxed my language a little (whilst I’m not a potty mouth IRL, I do occasional swear!)

And just started being more ME.

I also started taking chances with my photo’s: got myself off my camera’s auto setting and started playing around with it.

Again by default, those same things began to be mirrored in my Instagram feed.

And you know what? It’s been FUN these past 3 months.

The joy of it all *has* crept back in.

 

I put my positive pants on and it worked!

We are all allowed to feel drained or down – of course we are… but do try your hardest (as will I) not to compare yourself to others?

No one is having a holiday more perfect than your holiday.

No one’s kids are better than yours.

No one’s car is doing a better job of ferrying them around than your car.

No one’s home is better or more comfortable than your own home.

Others might have bigger budgets which result in them having bigger homes, designer handbags, more clothes and seemingly anything and every thing they want.

But my Grandma always told me that ‘your health is your wealth’…

And it’s true, isn’t it?

So start looking at the silver linings my friends… to me, from what I have seen of you- through your instagram likes, comments, feeds – you are all: beautiful, stylish, talented… not to mention a bit daft and silly and funny and down right ace.

We are *all* lucky.

My yoga teacher often quotes the same Teddy Roosevelt quote… she also reminds us how lucky and privileged we should feel that we have yoga in our lives… she tells us to smile – even a fake smile fools the brain into thinking we’re happy… and that if we’re grumpy or p*ssed off with someone… then to remind ourselves that “everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about.”

And it’s that latter thought I want to remind you all of: everything you see on your instagram feed is what others want you to see: it’s not the whole picture.

So, just as Johnny Cade said in S.E.Hinton’s ‘The Outsiders’:

“Stay gold, Ponyboy, Stay gold…”

So cut yourself some slack; give yourself a break… and Shine On.

You crazy diamond!

(All. The. Cliches. I know!)

And failing all of that: take a break!

It’s good to give your mind a proper break from it all and you might find you feel refreshed from it and might even change your IG habits to healthier once a day check-ins or something?

Right – I’ll get down off that preachy soap box and apols if it was a little too much for you.

I just needed to get it off my chest.

Moving on…

This week I placed a little HM order which should arrive tomorrow… this patterned dress with frills (£17.99):

Which I’m hoping might scratch that printed frock itch I have.

Only concerns are: I’m not sure that the colour will suit me, or whether I can cope with the frill… but when I saw this photo of it:

I couldn’t help but get a little excited about how it looks worn over trousers.

And so in my mind I’m wearing it over both my khaki and off-white wide leg crops; with ankle boots; over a t-shirt plus sneakers…

As a back up, I also ordered it in blue:

I can’t wait to try them both  – will report back next week.

The dress is also available in black:

Although, on this occasion, the black version seemed a little ‘meh’ to me.

I also ordered these Premium Camel Sunglasses (£24.99) which I can’t link to because they seem to have disappeared off the UK HM site.

 

Although they will more than likely be mahooosive on my little rice-crispy head, and the colour of the frames against my face could possibly make me look…erm… ill.

I’ll just have to wait and see.

Right, that’s it from me & my soapbox (#soznotsoz) and it’ll be business as usual with a Sunday 7 on… Sunday!

If you made it this far – thank you for sticking with me.

Would love to hear from you, but if you’re feeling a little shy and don’t fancy commenting… that’s alright too.

You are alright – exactly as you are.

All of us are.

Thank you

Bx